▲小組時間關於禱告的個人分享
在信主以後，關於禱告，我一直給自己打預防針：不能把神當成「有求必應」的土地公。之所以如此，是因為我們很難擺脫一種心理：想透過「所求應驗」來證明神的存在、或神是愛我的。這會讓我們對神的信心，受到「應驗與否」的擺佈。
可是反過來說，禱告若排除應驗與否的「檢驗」，那我們在禱告中就會有氣餒（信心越來越不足）的狀況----既然神有決定的主權，那「感覺上」我們的禱告就與神的垂聽脫勾（神真的有在聽嗎？），於是禱告時心中自然浮現這樣的念頭：「我還需要繼續禱告下去嗎？」
這是以理性面對禱告這件事的困境。縱然可以用「操練信心」的目的來禱告，但少了「驗證」，這樣的操練總感覺像是在「自我安慰＼催眠」。這也是我禱告操練成效不佳的原因。
所以，我太太的禱告經驗就讓我印象深刻。她是感性的人，跟神禱告，會什麼都跟神說，包括訴苦、抱怨等等。那是以「女兒」的身份、把上帝當「天上的父」所做的禱告，毫不保留。所以，神常常會給她獨特的啟示，安慰她、給她平安。
有一次，我與太太吵架，在跟神「申辯」的禱告過程中，神突然給我一陣「同理太太此刻受傷感受」的鼻酸，當下我懂了，便去找太太道歉（非申辯），彼此重歸於好。
所以，小組姊妹們剛剛分享的禱告是蒙福的：在禱告當下，你們就是上帝憐愛的女兒----這才是最大的福氣。你們的心對著上帝敞開，上帝必然垂聽你們的禱告，不管應許與否，神都是以「愛」來面對你們禱告。
▲ Personal Sharing About Prayer During Small Group Time
After becoming a Christian, regarding prayer, I’ve always given myself a mental warning: I must not treat God like a deity who grants every request. The reason is that it’s hard to escape a certain mindset—wanting to use the “fulfillment of requests” to prove God’s existence or to prove that God loves me. This makes our faith in God dependent on whether our prayers are answered.
But on the other hand, if we completely remove the “evaluation” of whether prayers are answered, we can easily become discouraged in prayer—our faith slowly weakens. Since God has the sovereignty to decide, it can feel like our prayers are disconnected from God’s hearing. (Is God really listening?) Naturally, while praying, a thought may arise: “Do I even need to keep praying?”
This is the struggle when trying to approach prayer rationally. Even though we can pray with the goal of “practicing faith,” without any form of “validation,” such practice can feel like self-comforting or self-hypnosis. This has been one reason why my own prayer life has not been very effective.
That’s why my wife’s experience with prayer leaves such a deep impression on me. She is a very emotional person; when she talks to God, she tells Him everything—her complaints, frustrations, and sorrows. She prays as a daughter speaking to her Heavenly Father, holding nothing back. And God often gives her unique insights, comforts her, and gives her peace.
Once, after my wife and I had an argument, I was “arguing my case” before God during prayer. Suddenly, God gave me a wave of sorrow—a deep empathy for my wife’s hurt at that moment. Right then, I understood. I went to her and apologized—not to defend myself—and we were reconciled.
So, the prayers you sisters just shared in small group are blessed. In the very moment you pray, you are daughters deeply loved by God—that is the greatest blessing. Your hearts are open before Him, and God absolutely hears your prayers. Whether He grants your requests or not, He always responds to you with love.
